Between schools, between jobs and between everything in 2001 I decided to take a leave off from all of the before mentioned to enjoy life itself with myself. 2000 was emotional drama when I moved from my newly acclaimed au pair family in Wisconsin, USA and back to Norway. I dreaded the flight back for months before, and also I had a hard time dealing with separating myself from the little baby girl I took care of, she had become my best friend during my 10 month stay. I've always had a hard time letting go of people, and maybe the fact that she also depended on me so much in everyday life made it even harder. Only 2 weeks after I came back to Norway, her family came to visit and I could hardly wait to get to see her, I spotted her mother and grandmother with a stroller in town, and jumped out of the car I was in with my mother before it stopped. I remember giving her mother a quick hug before running over to the stroller to speak to her and look at her and see if she remembered me. Love has so many shapes and forms, and I was heartbroken to see them go after playing for only 1 hour. I used to always carry her on my left arm, and my body had to adjust to nothing being there for months afterwards, and it was hard teaching the body to get rid of such a strong body memory with intense emotion attached to it.
I never get used to departure or separation of any kind. Time doesn't heal a thing, we just get more used to carrying the notions of dramas in our life around.
So love had struck and I had to leave her behind. New environment, old friends seemed new, and my new friends seemed like a distant memory of something I had once dreamt and emotions swirled inside, it was unreal. Even though I had moved several times before in life, this time I was detached, and just had to try to deal with who I was and what I was here for.
I knew what I wanted, but I didn't realize it!
Still today I get aha-moments where I suddenly realize things that I have only known for so many years, there's a huge difference. Everything becomes more real, touchable and fragile. It's easy to stay detached, because you live in a sort of vacuum and don't have to deal with things the same way you do if you're engaged. But somehow we all need to come out of it, the core of who we are cannot continue to be surpressed forever.

To be continued.

Siamese twin breakfast.

Frida

FRIDA

Our familys little best friend.


She helps out feeding the dogs at her uncles farm.

She is a sunshine, and she makes her aunt laugh.

She takes care of her teeth ver carefully

She loves apple juice.

She is a very peculiar little person.

Nothing wrong with her marching balance.

At a café Gardermoen Airport Oslo with my mother.

The whole family visiting my father at the hospital.

My niece with is!

Mamma

Mamma had no idea where we were going.




But golf makes her happy.



She has a strong and positive spirit.



She has just gotten her first dark grey iPod nano and dances with it, sings with it and sleeps with it. =)



She is the cutest and most beautiful woman I know of.

My brother and I, on our way to visit our dad at the hospital.











Mother, 2 daughters and 1 granddaughter enjoying dinner, camera and light!

My dad inspecting his papers at the emergency care unit.

Friday April 10 2009. My mother turns 60!
04.45am - Get up, noise dance, shower, get ready
06.00am - Drive to my mother and fathers house with my sister
06.30am - Surprise my mother in her bedroom with congratulations and make her get ready
07.00am - Leave for indoor simulator golf surprise for my mother and golf friends(1,5 h drive)
10.00am - 4 cakes transported by hand walking through a labyrinth of stairs
12.00pm - Entertaining my dad with my brother and sister
12.45pm - Drive to festivities with my dad and brother
13.00pm - Mother surprised with lunch party, friends, coworkers, family and food.
14.00pm - My dad isn't feeling well, off home with my little brother.
16.00pm - Stuffed! Hitting back home. 1,5 hour drive.
16.15pm - My dad and brother joins us on our way back home after taking wrong turn(s), ending up in Sweden, and then back again. =)
18.00pm - Home! Niece(1,5) and brother in law(32) comes to visit, we eat even more cake..
19.00pm - Dad has a very very very sick toe. I call the Emergency Care Unit.
20.15pm - Emergency Care Unit(20 min drive)! Waiting!
21.15pm - Dr. takes a look, doesn't look good. The sick toe and its owner has to be admitted to the hospital.
22.00pm - 20 min drive home, pack my dads stuff into a bag.
22.30pm - 40 min drive to the hospital
23.30pm - My father, my mother, my brother and I inside examination room.
00.30am - Examination, questions, doctors, pills, blood pressure, blood samples etc etc
02.00am - My dad gets admitted into care at the hospital.
02.30am - My brother needs his coffee and a hot dog to get the energy to drive home.
04.00am - Mother, brother and I arrive safely home. Eat. Talk.
05.00am - Sleep....zzzzz

Frog and cow

Frida's got a cow, Auntie's got a frog.

After a beautiful walk in the sun, we ended up downtown at one of our favourite nighttime restaurants and chattet about our dreams for a couple of hours. Enjoying our walk back home just as much in the cooler air, everything around us was lit golden by the street lights. Breathing in what's fresh and watching my favourite part of the evening turn dark made this night into such a pretty memory.

www.ekoladan.se

Today I recieved my first Ekolåda! The delivery guy was very accommodating, because I wasn't at home when he came to deliver, so one of my neighbours had to let him in.
The smell of the veggies was very pleasant, like something I remember from our own garden house at home when I was a child, hadn't quite expected this to be a reminder of times past. I haven't actually tasted anything yet, but I am just about to.
My snail seemed happy though, it came out of it's shell for the first time in days to check out the new goodies around him/her. Happy family!